May 5 2011
South African Scenes Screen Saver
A Screen Saver with 36 images from all over South Africa and images from the sea to animals to flowers. Enjoy
May 4 2011
About Porn and Romantic Movies
Romantic films are known to ruin relationships as they give unrealistic expectations to women about what to expect from men. Porn has the same effect on men.
May 4 2011
Judgement
If i have tattoos, I’m a trouble maker. I have curves, so I’m fat. If I have long hair, I’m out of control. If I say what I think, I’m an asshole. If I cry some times, I’m a sissy. If I have girlfriends, I’m a messing around. If I stand up for myself, I’m arrogant.
Seems like you can’t do anything now a days without being labeled. So what, go ahead and label me, see if I give a crap.
Feb 4 2011
Friends
Recently, life has tough me a new lesson about friends.
Amongst the many types of friends, two types stand out. Those who wants to be like you and those who despise who you are.
Those who wants to be like you will adore you, help you up when you fall, listen to you, give you advice, share your pain, share your joy, will share the joy of your achievements.
Those who despise who you are will walk over you when you down, drain your energy, criticize everything you do that they cant do, rule your life, want nothing for you that they cant have either in breaking down your achievements.
The sad thing is that we all have friends like this.
Friend
Definition: confidant, companion
Synonyms: acquaintance, ally, alter ego, associate, bosom buddy, buddy, chum*, classmate, cohort, colleague, companion, compatriot, comrade, consort, cousin, crony, familiar, intimate, mate, pal, partner, playmate, roommate, schoolmate, sidekick, soul mate, spare*, well-wisher
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Jun 14 2010
Google Chrome
Google Chrome is a browser that combines a minimal design with sophisticated technology to make the web faster, safer, and easier. Download and install your copy free.
Jun 13 2010
Getroude Lewe
Drie vriendinne, een in ‘n informele verhouding, een verloof en een ‘n lank getroude vrou, ontmoet oor ‘n paar drankies na werk.
Hulle besluit om hulle liefdeslewens bietjie op te kikker en die manne in hulle lewens te verras met ‘n stoutigheidjie.
‘n Week later kom hulle weer bymekaar.
Die enkel meisie sê, “Ek het na my vriend se kantoor gegaan met ‘n lang jas aan. Na almal weg is het ek die jas laat Val en al wat ek aangehad het was ‘n leer korset met swart sykouse en hoëhak skoene. Ons het net daar op sy lessenaar liefde gemaak.”
Die verloofde vrou sê, “Toe my verloofde by die huis aankom, het ek vir hom gewag met ‘n swart masker, korset, sykouse en hoëhakke. Ons het die hele nag passievolle liefde gemaak, en nou wil hy vroeër trou.”
Die getroude vrou sit haar glas neer en sê, “Ek het baie beplanning gedoen. Die kinders is na my ma toe, ek het ‘n lang bad geneem met gegeurde olie en my beste parfuum aangespuit. Ek het in ‘n stywe leer korset geklim met swart sykouse en ses duim hoëhakke, alles afgerond met ‘n swart masker. My man het by die huis gekom, ‘n bier en die afstandbeheer gegryp, homself op die bank neergeplak en uitgeroep…
Hei Batman, wat eet ons?
Jun 13 2010
Iraqi rugby player
The Lions manager flies to Baghdad to watch a young Iraqi play rugby, is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to Gauteng. Two weeks later the Lions are 18-6 down to the Bulls with only 20 minutes left to play. The manager gives the young Iraqi winger the nod and on he goes.
The lad is a sensation, scores 4 tries in 20 minutes and wins the game for the Lions. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star. When the player comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in Super 14 Rugby.
“Hello mum, guess what?” he says “I played for 20 minutes today, and we were 18-6 down but I scored 4 tries and we won! Everybody loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me!”
“Wonderful,” says his mum, “Let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot in the street and robbed; your sister and I were ambushed, gang raped and beaten; your brother has joined a gang of looters and all while you were having such a great time playing rugby”
The young lad is very upset. “What can I say mum, but I am so sorry.”
“Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!” shrieks his mum, “It’s your fault we moved to Jo’Burg in the first place!”
Mar 20 2010
Tomato Garden
an old Italian lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard.
His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:
Dear Vincent,I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Papa
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Pop,Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.
Love,
Vinnie
At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.
That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Pop,Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you,
Vinnie
Mar 20 2010
Hotel Bill
A husband and wife are traveling by car from Cape Town to Musina .
After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they’re too tired to continue and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road. When they check out four hours later, the desk Clerk; hands them a bill for R950.00.
The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it’s a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren’t worth R950.00.
When the clerk tells him R950.00 is the standard rate, the man insists on speaking to the Manager.
The Manager appears, listens to the man, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use.
“But we didn’t use them,” the man complains.
“Well, they are here, and you could have,” explains the Manager.
He goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. “The best entertainers from Jhb, Cape Town, and Dbn perform here,” the Manager says.
“But we didn’t go to any of those shows,” complains the man again.
“Well, we have them, and you could have,” the Manager replies.
No matter what amenity the Manager mentions, the man replies, “But We didn’t use it!”
The Manager is unmoved, and eventually the man gives up and agrees To pay.
He writes a cheque and gives it to the Manager.
The Manager is surprised when he looks at the cheque . “But sir,” he says, “this cheque is only made out for R250.00.”
“That’s correct,” says the man. “I charged you R700.00 for sleeping with my wife.”
“But I didn’t!” exclaims the Manager.
“Well, too bad,” the man replies. “She was here and you could have.”
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